Deconstructed Future

What’s a perfect day?

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As I’m sitting in this beautiful industrial loft space filled with light, sipping a double espresso, writing about anything I want, I’m in a delicate bliss. I feel as if I never want to leave. I don’t usually get this taken by places, but there is something about the simplicity of this space that resonates with what I might be missing in my life; order, breathing open space, time to think. Today was marred by an existential melancholy of “where do I go from here”. I’m in Barcelona, doing what I love, working on a project that I am getting more and more passionate about, and yet tomorrow still seems uncertain when put under the microscope. Do I now focus on cinema and directing? Seems chaotic. What about music? Of course, but only if I can sneak away to the tranquil places in the world. I can’t tell if any of these sentiments are genuine, or I’m suffering from a slight overwhelm with everything that’s going on. And again a wave of gratitude floods me as I come back to this little moment of reprieve, sitting in a space I would probably want to own someday. 

Since thinking through this persistent confusion will never lead to any tangible conclusions, could reverse engineering a perfect day lead to any demonstrable results?

I wake up, in a space very similar to this one here; open, lots of white, minimalistic furniture, natural wood accents, big windows, a sky-light. It’s not a cheap place. Rent per month for a loft like this around 3k a month? Perhaps less depending on the city. If my salary then must be 40x my rent, I would need to be making an annual income of 120k. 

I look out the window and see a clean and architecturally pleasing city. Stockholm or Copenhagen come to mind. Also I prefer cooler climates. 

Being a sucker for deep and meaningful relationships, I doubt myself living along in this loft. 

Morning is quiet time. Meditation. Journaling. Breath work. Cold showers. Open space and time. The day doesn’t start until later. 

I go to a local cafe. Since I’m vibing with my current Barcelona locale so much, I wish it to be similar. Art on the wall. No music. Light murmur of voices. I’m writing. For some reason poetry comes to mind. But likely a lot of non-fiction. Perhaps I’ll get to fiction someday, but for now, this image rings true. 

Afterwards I meet up with “my team”. A team of creatives who all have their own passion projects, yet we’re all working on bigger things. It’s most likely a film, or a music project of some sort. Ideally, we would fuse all of this together to creative impactful and meaningful work. Diving a bit deeper into the greater context of this scene, I probably own a small production company/recording studio for up and coming artists; giving mentorship to those who are pursuing non-traditional modes of work…. We discuss the current project, coordinate, set work/shoot dates, book travel, and that brings us to the close of our work day. 

In the evening I meet with my partner, she tells me about her day as we walk through the city. She’s inspiring. Challenges me. A source of love and spiritual/intellectual stimulation. She also always calls me out on my shit and keeps my ego in check. After some wine and light vegetarian fare, we try to decide whether or not to go and see some live jazz at a venue not too far from us. (So weird that I said vegetarian… I’m not vegetarian in the slightest having had a diet of 90% jamon here in Barcelona, but for the sake of the narrative, It’s the first thing that came to mind) We pop in for a few songs and meander back to my/our place in a warm haze of light intoxication from the music and dry white wine. 

Finally relaxing in a spacious living room with some Chet Baker humming in the background, we get a chance to talk into the evening before we lose ourselves to desire for one another. 

Tomorrow we fly out for the weekend to visit family. It’s someone’s birthday. I’ve finally found my tribe.

 


Well. That’s a lot of jazz and flowery shit, but I kinda like it. Actually, the above is EXACTLY the reality I wish to craft and curate as these years move on. 

 

So to distill this to a tangible goal - I want to be the head of a creative production company/mentorship facility, that fosters growth for people who are in the visual/music fields, as well as engages with larger companies around the world to put their creative ideas on their feet. I want to direct, shoot, write, perform and do all of the things, but by my own rules. Alone time is necessary. Tranquility is necessary. Yet dynamic projects will also be of paramount importance in this ideal scenario. This all seems pretty perfect to me. Looks like that’s where I’m headed…

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